LookingtoJesus

Love Bears All Things, Believes All Things, Hopes All Things, Endures All Things

Bible Reading: 1 Corinthians 13:4-8a; Romans 15:1-3; 1 Peter 4:7-8; Galatians 6:10; 2 Timothy 2:24-26

There’s a lot of mystery here in 1 Corinthians 13:7.  How can love do these things with respect to all things!  The challenges with understanding these aspects of Christlike love remind us of a very important truth.  The love of Jesus is transcendent (Ephesians 3:17-18)!  This passage speaks not of a human love improved upon, but speaks of the nature of that kind of love which is true of God and comes only from Him.  The call of this passage is not to try harder to be better when it comes to loving others in a Christ-like manner, the call is to walk by the Spirit, fixing our eyes on Jesus, so His love might flow through us.

Recall the simple statement of 1 John 3:16, “By this we know love, that he laid down his life for us.” If we wonder as to the nature of Christlike love we should direct our thoughts cross-ward! What does it mean that “love bears all things?” There’s no better example of this, than what we see in Jesus, who “has borne our griefs and carried our sorrows” (Isaiah 53:4). He did that in a salvific way, which is something we can never do. We love like Jesus when we earnestly relate to others, bearing with their faults and imperfections according to a “I care about you” way of thinking (Galatians 6:2). Always keeping in mind that the other person is “one for whom Christ died” (Romans 14:15).

Love believes all things. That’s not to say love is naïve, or that it exercises no discernment (Philippians 1:9)! What do we find in the example of Jesus? Jesus is “the founder and perfecter of our faith” (Hebrews 12:2). He lovingly believed in all things when there was no earthly reason to believe at all. Amidst unimaginable sufferings, in bearing our sins, He exercised faith when He nevertheless cried out to the Father: “My God, my God, why have you forsaken me” (Matthew 27:46)? Even at the point of death, when He experienced the Father’s wrath for sin in divine judgment, Jesus still trusted in the Father’s love (1 Peter 2:23). It is as Phil Ryken has noted: “When we see Jesus on the cross, we see a man showing us how to believe all things. What enabled him to believe all things was love: love for his Father and love for us.” Amidst our own hardships, we love like Jesus when we live in subjection to the Father, deciding to love even when it involves sacrifice.

Love hopes all things. Biblical hope is not a hoping in hope kind of thing, but a confident expectation regarding some unseen future reality. That scene at the cross, where we, God’s creatures, mocked our creator, is arguably the most dramatic display in history of the extent of man’s hopelessness. Yet Jesus still hoped all things. From the cross He promised paradise to the penitent thief! When the time came, He cried out with a loud voice, “Father, into your hands I commit my spirit” (Luke 23:46)! We lovingly hope all things according to Jesus’ example when we similarly relate to others, mindful that God is fully capable of working in their lives for good, even when their situation seems hopeless.

Love endures all things. It was a long journey that led Jesus’ to the cross, a journey full of trials, suffering and loss. Along the way, step by step, He lovingly subjected Himself to the Father, until His work was done. Then from the cross, having endured it all, He said those three glorious words, “It is finished” (John 19:30)! Hebrews 12:3 reminds us to “consider him who endured from sinners such hostility against himself.” That’s the way love works, as Alexander Strauch has noted, “Love is strong and tenacious: ‘No hardship or rebuff ever makes love cease to be love.’ Love lasts; it holds out; it perseveres in the face of opposition, unkindness, and difficulties; it never gives up.”

Aware of what Jesus can do, God’s kind of love is hopeful and optimistic with respect to others.  Confronted by failures, challenges, opposition and doubts, it does not surrender to the hopelessness which is so pervasive in our world.  It respects others and genuinely cares about them, it trusts them to God, it prayerfully yearns for God’s best for them, it forgives and endures through failures and setbacks.  It walks its own difficult journey until what is perfect in Jesus, is one day perfected by the Spirit in us.  That’s all a part of what it means to love like Jesus!

We Love Like Jesus When we Relate to Others with a Spirit-borne Optimism in What God Can Do 

Lord Jesus.  How wonderful Your work in our lives!  We were guilty, vile and helpless in our sins.  But You bore our sins and set us free.  Sin had put us in a helpless state.  But You rescued us from the pit of our despair and granted us Your peace.  We were without You and without hope in this world, but You saved us and opened our eyes to the hope laid up for us in heaven.  Nothing can work now to separate us from Your love.  We are eternally grateful!  You’ve so wonderfully loved us, may we love others just as You have loved us.  Grant us eyes to see them as You do.  Fill our hearts with a Spirit-borne optimism and compassion, borne out of Your love, that we might be always wanting and working for Your best in their lives.  Amen.

Love does not Rejoice in Unrighteousness, but Rejoices with the Truth

Bible Reading: 1 Corinthians 5:1-2, 13:4-8a; Proverbs 24:17; Philippians 1:15-18

Many of us will recall when Paul Harvey used to grace the radio airways with his “The Rest of the Story” broadcasts. On one occasion he spoke as to why good news won’t sell in media broadcasts and newspapers, saying, “The reader does not want to read about some rich man who’s healthy and happily married. But if the rich man is divorced or diseased or loses his money, that’s more interesting reading, because then the reader can feel himself to be better off. There’s always somebody in any hospital ward just enough worse off to help us feel comparatively fortunate, and noisy news serves that purpose. And thus the plane crash which does not involve you, the billionaire in bankruptcy, the charity boss caught stealing, the movie actor charged with murder, these will continue on Page One as long as the fire which burns them warms the rest of us.”

Christ-like love is never glad for bad, but is glad whenever truth prevails. Therein lies the problem for us with respect to loving like Jesus. We don’t always act this way.

Ray Pritchard, “Love does not delight in evil. It takes no pleasure in wrongdoing, is not glad about injustice, and is not happy when evil triumphs. And it takes no joy in hearing evil openly discussed. Love is never glad to hear bad news about another person. Love never says, “Well, they finally got what they deserved.”  Love is never happy to hear that a brother or sister fell into sin.  Love does not enjoy passing along bad news. This certainly goes against the grain of modern life. We all know that “Bad news sells” and that good news goes on page 75. That’s why they put those supermarket tabloids right by the checkout counter. We all want to hear the latest juicy gossip about our favorite celebrities. True love isn’t like that. It turns away from cheap gossip and unsubstantiated rumors. And even when the rumor turns out to be true, love takes no pleasure in the misfortunes of others.”

Instead love rejoices with the truth.  The religious leaders chided Jesus because He was hanging out with tax collectors and sinners.  He responded with a series of parables which spoke to the purpose for which He had come–to seek and save that which was lost.  Addressing this, He spoke of a shepherd having one hundred sheep, which would leave the ninety-nine to go in search of one that is lost.  And when it is found, Jesus said, there’d be much joy.  And so it is when a lost person comes to the knowledge of the truth: “Just so,” Jesus said, “there will be more joy in heaven over one sinner who repents than over ninety-nine righteous persons who need no repentance” (Luke 15:7).  That’s the way things are supposed to be.  Remember what happened with the prodigal son?  He came to his senses and was restored to his father, and there was much joy.  But not for the elder brother who grumbled over the good.  Love rejoices for the right things and for the right reasons.  As Gordon Fee put it, “The person full of Christian love joins in rejoicing on the side of behavior that reflects the gospel—for every victory gained, every forgiveness offered, every act of kindness.”

So how are we to love like Jesus in this way?  First we need to acknowledge that in the flesh we have a nasty tendency to be glad for bad.  Then, we need to be led and empowered by the Spirit and the Word to think God’s way about such things.  Jesus is the best example of One who never rejoiced in unrighteousness (He was never glad for bad).  He rejoiced with the truth and was in fact born into the world to “bear witness to the truth” (John 18:37). 

In a society obsessed with bad news, we need to be people who delight in the good.  Jesus is the truth.  The gospel is the gospel of truth.  To be saved is to come to a knowledge of the truth.  If we are to love like Jesus, we need to be the truth’s biggest cheerleaders.  Whenever and wherever truth prevails, we rejoice along with the angels in heaven.  As we love like Jesus in this manner, it’ll work to help us to build and maintain healthy relationships and bear a credible testimony before the lost (Philippians 1:27)!

Love is Never Glad for Bad, but Rejoices Whenever the Truth Prevails

Praise You Heavenly Father for Your goodness! You are good and do good–always and forever! Any good in this world and any good in me can be traced back to You! Forgive us for our sinful tendency to delight in bad news! There is so much of it in this world. And our flesh is drawn to it. But that’s not love. Work a change in our hearts Lord! Even as the Spirit grieves over sin, may our hearts grieve too. Thank you for the truth, Lord! Thank you for its work in our lives! May our hearts be so very glad for Your truth! May it overflow our hearts and govern our thoughts. In love, may we speak and do according to the truth of Your Word. That You might be glorified in the triumph of the working of Your truth in our lives and in the lives of others. Amen.

Love Does not Take Into Account a Wrong Suffered

Bible Reading: 1 Corinthians 13:4-8a; Matthew 18:21-35; Ephesians 4:31-32

It was a January day 24 years ago.  John had been drinking all day and had a rap sheet of prior offenses pages long.  Youthful for her 69 years, my mother-in-law Jean was headed in her car to the elementary school to play volleyball.  Driving at a high rate of speed down a residential street, with a blood alcohol level over twice the legal limit, he was oblivious to the four way stop which was ahead of him.  Jean entered the intersection having no idea it would be the last thing she’d ever do.  The impact of John’s truck into Jean’s car killed her instantly.  We got the call soon after… Laura’s mom was gone…just like that!  She was a wonderful woman whose heart was full of love for Jesus and for others. It would be impossible to measure the extent of sorrow and grief the family experienced in her loss.  In an instant the trajectory of many lives was radically changed forevermore.  You cannot go through such an experience without dealing with some incredibly difficult questions and overwhelming emotions.  Justice was served, John was arrested and eventually convicted of his crime.  He’d go on to serve a 7 year sentence, yet that did not resolve the loss.  One of the things I remember most in the aftermath of that tragedy was the response of our youngest five-year old daughter.  She’d lost her Grandma, who had been there at her birth and had so incredibly loved her, yet every day over the subsequent months, and with childlike faith, she’d pray for the salvation of the man who had killed her grandma.

What’s to be done with the wrongs we suffer?  They are an inevitable part of life.  People say and do hurtful things, sometimes intentionally and sometimes unintentionally. But they hurt.  And we’ve a tendency to respond in kind.  Hit me and I’ll hit you back.  Speak evil of me and I’ll do the same to you.  Gossip about me, and I’ll set the phone lines on fire doing the same in return.  That’s the way things typically work in our world.  Tragically, the result is as Gandhi once observed, “An eye for an eye leaves the whole world blind”  And sometimes instead of striking out in response to offenses we choose instead to hold on to them inside ourselves.  Though we may do a good job of hiding it, inside we seethe with bitterness over some prior offense, big or small.  The term translated “take into account” has to do with one’s thinking.  Love does not preoccupy itself with a wrong suffered, but in the absence of love that’s exactly what happens.  Faults have a tendency to grow in measure as one’s thoughts are captivated by them. Undoubtedly, this is why we are warned to “not let the sun go down on your anger” lest we give the devil an opportunity (Ephesians 4:26-27).  In 30 years of pastoral ministry I’ve seen nothing work to cause more damage in one’s life than a person holding onto bitterness.  Bitterness can cause immeasurable emotional, physical, and spiritual harm–in some occasions lasting for many years.  It is as Marianne Williamson once said, “Unforgiveness is like drinking poison yourself and waiting for the other person to die.”

We are prone to either ventilate or incubate our anger, but there is a better option availed to us in Christ.  Love does not take into account a wrong suffered.  As the Son of God having come into our world, no one has ever deserved more and received less.  Though He was without sin and never sinned, He was unjustly tried and convicted and crucified.  It was our sins which put Him on that cross.  And as He bore the sins of us all, He cried out “Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do” (Luke 23:34)!  He did not take into account all the incredibly grievous wrongs He suffered!  We believers have been so immensely blessed in His forgiveness.  Our record of debt which stood against us, has been canceled out by means of His shed blood (Colossians 2:13-14).  A mountain of debt in sin was swept away by His loving sacrifice.  

How ironic then, that we would sometimes choose to refuse to forgive others. Indeed, the Scriptures admonish us, “Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you” (Ephesians 4:32).  The term translated “forgiving” here means literally to bestow grace.  It speaks of a deliberate act on our part in which we freely and unconditionally remit a debt owed to us.  That’s what forgiveness does.  It doesn’t ignore the offense.  It doesn’t excuse the offense.  It deliberately chooses to forgive. In his book “The Peacemaker,” Ken Sande outlines four promises associated with forgiving someone: 1) I will not dwell on this incident; 2) I will not bring up this incident again and use it against you; 3) I will not talk to others about this incident; and 4) I will not let this incident stand between us, or hinder our personal relationship.” That’s a good approach to follow

Love does not take into account a wrong suffered. Alexander Strauch shared this pertinent example: “Clara Barton, founder of the American Red Cross and known as the “Angel of the Battlefield,” was a remarkable woman of lionhearted courage and sterling character.  Like any prominent person she had critics.  When a friend of hers reminded Clara of the criticism someone had made of her work, Clara couldn’t remember it.  Surprised, her friend said, ‘You don’t remember it?’  Clara’s response is classic: ‘No, I distinctly remember forgetting it.’”

Love does not take into account a wrong done against us.  You’ve been immeasurably blessed in that way by the love of Jesus.  You’ve been called by God to be forgiving of others, just as God in Christ has forgiven you.  That’s part of what it means to love like Jesus!

To Forgive is the Most God-like Act We Can Do

Lord Jesus.  Thank you for forgiving my sins!  I remember that day long ago when I trusted in You and You swept my sins away–just like that.  In that incredible act of grace and mercy You canceled out my debt of sin!  And though my sins were great and many, I bear the guilt of them no more.  How grievous then when I choose to refuse to forgive others.  Forgive me for my unforgiving ways.  Grant me the grace to behave as Your child.  May others see in me, when I forgive, what is perfectly true in You.  We are all prone to doing stupid things which cause harm to others, may the Spirit work to instruct and lead us along in Your higher path of forgiveness.  Amen.

Love is not Provoked

Bible Reading: 1 Corinthians 1:10-11, 13:4-8a; 1 Peter 2:21-23

A Peanuts cartoon shows Lucy standing with her arms folded and a stern expression on her face.  Charlie Brown pleads, “Lucy, you must be more loving.  This world really needs love.  You have to let yourself love to make this world a better place.”  Lucy angrily whirls around and knocks Charlie Brown to the ground.  She screams at him, “Look, Blockhead, the world I love.  It’s people I can’t stand.”  Who hasn’t been provoked or irritated by people?

The ESV translates this phrase, “(love) is not irritated.”  The NASB has it, “(love) is not provoked.”  The Greek term means to sharpen and speaks metaphorically of being roused to anger.  Interestingly, the English term paroxysm is derived from the Greek and speaks similarly of “a sudden attack, or violent expression of a particular emotion.”  In describing the term used here Phil Ryken wrote, “Love is not grumpy or grouchy.  Love does not get ticked off.  Love does not go off on a rampage or a tirade.  Love does not launch into verbal abuse, or give people the silent treatment, or get into a bad temper, or do whatever else it is tempted to do when people are angry or irritated.”

Let’s face it–people are problematic.  They are prone to saying and doing things which inevitably rub us the wrong way.  Consider the troubles of the church in Corinth–there were disagreements about theology, idolatry, sexual immorality, spiritual gifts, etc.  No doubt there were many situations about which those folks grew irritated.  And we know what that’s like.  Who hasn’t grown grumpy or grouchy in dealing with other people.  If we are honest, we are all fully capable of annoying someone else in one way or the other. 

Again we marvel at the example of the Lord Jesus! Read through the gospel accounts–you’ll not find any instances of Him being roused to sinful anger in his dealing with folks. He preached in Nazareth, the place where He had been brought up, and they ran Him out of town.  He healed countless folks, but sometimes on the Sabbath, so the religious leaders criticized Him.  Day after day, from sunrise to sunset, He ministered to multitudes of people, still you will not read of Him growing grouchy.  Some were accusing Him of doing His miracles by the power of the devil.  Still He was not roused to anger.  The religious leaders plotted against Him.  Judas betrayed Him.  He was arrested and His disciples abandoned Him.  Still you will not read of Him growing irritated or launching into a verbal tirade.  He was falsely accused in an unjust trial.  He was scourged, stripped naked, and adorned with a crown of thorns and mocked–still He was not provoked.  He was nailed to a cross.  They gambled for His garments.  He’s mocked by all–the soldiers, the thieves who were crucified with Him, the religious leaders, and those passing by.  But though reviled, He did not revile in return.  Though threatened, He uttered no threats.  The One who put the stars in place and created that very hill called Calvary, endured it all without responding in kind to the abuse He suffered. Why?  He had come to do the Father’s will and He kept entrusting Himself to the Father.  In love God sent His Son to die.  In love the Son willingly subjected Himself to it all. He endured all of that for you!  People are problematic.  They do stupid and hurtful things.  But Jesus came to die on a cross for our stupidity and the sin which lies at the root of it all.  

Life is filled with all kinds of challenges.  Sometimes people do the dumbest and most inconsiderate things.  It’s easy to grow irritated, or be roused to anger in response.  It helps to remind ourselves of the example of Jesus.  The irritations we face pale in comparison to the suffering He endured.  Amidst His suffering He kept entrusting Himself to the Father, we do well to do the same.  God has not called us to a life of self-serving preservation, but a life in which we are privileged by the Spirit to imitate Christ in dying to self, that we might instead serve Him by serving others.  That’s a part of what it means to love like Jesus.

People are Problematic but Love is not Provoked

Lord Jesus.  Thank you for loving us!  Thank you for Your amazing patience.  We think about the cross and all that You endured and are amazed at Your response.  We think about all the times we’ve been irritated with others, and for such minor things–forgive us.  And how prone we are to being provoked when people do or say things we don’t like.  How beautiful are Your ways, O Lord!  In You we find hope.  You’ve revealed to us a far better way of thinking and living.  But our flesh is so reluctant and so resistant to change.  Change our hearts, O Lord, that we might put aside our selfish tendencies!  Grant us the grace that we might be gracious in all our dealings with others!   Amen.

Love Does Not Seek its Own

Bible Reading: 1 Corinthians 11:23-31, 13:4-8a; Philippians 2:1-8

In 1977 a man named Robert Ringer self-published a book entitled “Looking Out for Number One.” It became a #1 bestseller and is still considered to be one of the top fifteen self-help books of all time.  The book was based on the premise that since man’s inherent nature is to look out for number one, we need to do a better job of looking out for number one.  Here’s a quote, “We sometimes lose sight of the fact that our primary objective is really to be as happy as possible and that all our other objectives, great and small, are only a means to that end.” That phrase— “looking out for number one”—has since become a part of our culture’s vernacular.  But we do not need a book to teach us how to be selfish…we have the world, the flesh and the devil all encouraging us to live that way. 

The church in Corinth was rife with selfish behavior.  They were not sharing when it came to their observance of the Lord’s supper, and some were going away hungry.  There were some who were so concerned about standing up for their rights, that they were even suing their fellow believers, and doing so before the non-Christians.  And they were not using their spiritual gifts to build up others, but to build up themselves that they might impress others. The truth was, that in looking out for #1, they had failed to look to the example of the true #1, the Lord Jesus Christ Himself!

From birth we are prone to such behavior.  Children do not need to be taught to look out for number one in the demanding of things, as we are all born to selfishness. We now live in that time of which we were warned, in which people would be “lovers of self” (2 Timothy 3:2).  The words “I, me, my, myself” predominate.  We are a society filled with people who live their lives thinking that the universe revolves around them, but who are growing increasingly frustrated by the universe’s refusal to cooperate.  As the Pogo cartoon once put, “We’ve met the enemy and it is us!”  What hope do we have for victory over the selfishness that lies so deeply rooted within us?

The Word became flesh and dwelt amongst us and in Him a radically different manner of life was unveiled.  The One who was rich, yet became poor, did not seek His own when He ventured into this sin-needy place.  He did not seek His own as He perfectly subjected Himself to the Father’s will.  He lived according to the godly character that was innate to His being.  So what do we discover as we examine His life?  He took on the form of a bondservant.  He came not to be served, but to serve.  He was accompanied by no royal entourage.  He had no home and no possessions.  He pursued no selfish dreams or ambitions.  He served others.  Purposefully.  Relentlessly.  Sacrificially.  He taught that it is more blessed to give than to receive, and that is the way He lived.  He was surrounded daily with people having needs, and He gave and gave.  He was conspired against and betrayed, and then arrested and put on trial–still He did not seek His own, for He had prayed, “Father, not my will, but yours be done” (Luke 22:42).  He was accused and convicted, beaten and crucified.  He was mocked and insulted as He hung on that cross, but He still did not seek His own, for He had come to give His life a ransom for many (Mark 10:45)!  

How radically beautiful is Jesus’ example of selflessness!  On the merit of His willing sacrifice on the cross for our sins, we have been saved.  The cross speaks likewise to the merit of His manner of life, for He came not just to wonderfully save us, but to radically change us!  “Have this mind among yourselves,” wrote the Apostle Paul, “which is yours in Christ Jesus” (Philippians 2:5).  You’ve been called to a dramatically different manner of thinking and living!  He came to serve, He is called you to do the same–in your marriage, family, workplace, school setting, church community–the question is not what other people can do for you, but how you can best serve Jesus in serving them?  Of course, it is only by the Spirit that we can do this!  But as He bears a selfless love in us, we’ve a unique opportunity in these increasingly narcissistic times, to bear a credible witness before a world of folks who need the Savior!

Jesus Did Not Seek His Own and He Calls Us to Think and Live in the Same Way

Lord Jesus.  How amazing You are in Your selfless ways!  How radically different and beautiful was Your life set against the backdrop of our sinful and selfish lives!  Forgive us for our selfishness.  Thank You for saving us, and patiently working in our lives such that we might walk in the newness of life that is characterized by Your love.  We know that self is too powerful a foe to be subdued in our own strength, grant us Your supernatural power, by the Spirit, that the old might give way to the new in us.  You’ve reminded us that it’s more blessed to give than to receive, but there’s a part of us that is always wanting.  May the Spirit work to renew our minds, so that we will think as we should about such things.  Thank You for saving us and patiently working to save us!  In Your Name.  Amen

Love does not Act Unbecomingly

Bible Reading: 1 Corinthians 11:17-22, 13:4-8a; Titus 3:1-2

According to a recent Time magazine article rudeness is on the rise in our society: “September 2021 was a bad month for manners. On the 21st, a woman pulled a gun on servers at a Philadelphia fast food restaurant when they asked her to order online. On the 16th, several women from Texas pummeled a hostess at a New York City family-style restaurant. A few days prior to that a Connecticut mother was investigated for slapping an elementary school bus driver and that same week, a California woman was charged with felony assault for attacking a Southwest airlines flight attendant and dislodging some of her teeth…Americans appear to have forgotten their niceties, especially with those whose job it is to assist them. Lawyers are reporting ruder clients. Restaurants are reporting ruder clients. Flight attendants, for whom rude clients are no novelty, are reporting mayhem.” – Time Magazine, October 15, 2021, by Belinda Luscombe.  But you didn’t need a Time magazine article to tell you this, as you’ve no doubt witnessed such bad behaviors yourself.  

The term translated “unbecomingly” means to “behave unmannerly, disgracefully or dishonorably.”  To act unbecomingly is to be rude, thoughtlessly showing no concern or respect for the rights or feelings of others.  We are rude when we fail to be polite and courteous.  Note the context, rude behavior is rooted in pride (the characteristic which precedes) and self-centeredness (the characteristic which follows). Rudeness treats other people as if they do not matter.

Rude behavior is nothing new and was evident in the church in Corinth.  There were some in the church who were eating meat that had been offered to idols, ignoring the concerns and sensitivities of their weaker brethren (1 Corinthians chapter 8).  In their observance of the Lord’s supper, some were vying to go first, and others were drunk (1 Corinthians 11:21-22, 33).  And again, there were some who were despising–what they supposed to be–the lesser spiritual gifts of others (1 Corinthians 12:20-25).

Jesus did not act unbecomingly.  When you consider His life, you will never find Him looking down on others.  He was never thoughtless or inconsiderate. To be sure, He sometimes spoke hard truths, but He always did so in love.  He did not treat the supposed important people one way, and the supposed unimportant people in another way.  Whereas the religious leaders treated some with contempt, Jesus was thoughtful and considerate towards all, even those deemed by society to be irredeemable or unworthy of respect.  

Walking according to Jesus’ example, we need to be careful in how we think of others.  According to 1 Peter 2:17 we are to “honor everyone”  Treat others and speak to others as if they matter to you (Philippians 2:3; Ephesians 4:29). Be polite. Be courteous. Be thoughtful.  When it comes to building and maintaining healthy relationships, and bearing forth a credible testimony, little things can make a big difference 

Alexander Strauch has addressed the importance of the matter: “As Western societies become more coarse and thoughtless of basic standards of courtesy and social decency, we must resist the acceptance of rude behavior.  If not, it will have a harmful, degrading effect on our lives and our churches.”  From a positive perspective, when we are respectful and courteous, according to the example of Jesus, we will shine all the more brightly in the midst of a society where rudeness is increasingly becoming the norm.

Rudeness is Treating Other People as if They Do not Matter.  But Jesus Says They Do

Lord Jesus.  How we praise You for Your loving and selfless ways!  This sin-cursed world can be an awfully cruel place, and we sometimes wonder if anyone cares.  But in looking to You we find hope, for amazingly You have gone to incredible lengths to prove that we do matter.  How thankful we are that You have loved us and delivered Yourself up for us!  How privileged we are to be Your ambassadors here, now.  Amidst the growing rudeness of our society, You’ve granted us a unique opportunity to speak and act in a radically different manner, according to Your wonderful example.  Grant that we might be led and empowered by the Spirit to be thoughtful and considerate of others, that we might be used by You in making Your gospel known.  Amen.

Love does not Brag and is not Arrogant

Bible Reading: 1 Corinthians 4:6-7, 13:4-8a; 3 John 9-11

There were four people on a plane: a kid, a pastor, a doctor, and the smartest man in the world. Suddenly, the pilot came running to the back and yelled “The plane is going down and we only have 4 parachutes but 5 people.” With this, the pilot took a parachute and jumped out of the plane”. The doctor said, “I save lives every day and the world needs me” and he also took a parachute and jumped out.” The smartest man in the world said “My research might save millions. The world needs my brain” and he also took a parachute and jumped. The pastor and the kid looked at each other and the pastor said, “I’m old now, I’ve lived a long and enjoyable life, you take the last parachute”. To which the boy responded, “Don’t worry, there’s still two parachutes left. The smartest man in the world just jumped with my backpack!”  Pride is problematic and exercises a destructive influence on all our relationships.

“Love does not brag and is not arrogant” (1 Corinthians 13:4, NASB).  The two selfish vices referred to here are both rooted in sinful pride.  The Phillips translation expresses the phrase this way: “This love of which I speak…is neither anxious to impress nor does it cherish inflated ideas of its own importance.”  To brag is to pridefully boast of one’s own achievements, with a view to impressing others. To be arrogant is to hold to an elevated view of oneself.

Some in Corinth were engaged in these destructive vices, boasting of their superior wisdom and knowledge (1 Corinthians 3:18, 14:2) or bragging of their purported elevated spirituality (1 Corinthians 14:37).  Paul chided them for their arrogance (1 Corinthians 5:2).  As Phil Ryken has noted, it is impossible “to love and boast at the same time.”  That’s because such prideful behavior is by nature focused on self, and love focuses not on self, but others. C. S. Lewis called bragging the “utmost evil.” It is the epitome of pride, which is the root sin of all sins. Sinful pride puts self first.  Everyone else, including God Himself, must be deemed to be less important.  It is impossible to tout oneself, without putting others down.  

We live in a day in which pride is celebrated and humility is disdained, but that’s not the way God views things (2 Timothy 3:2; Proverbs 3:34; James 4:6; 1 Peter 5:5).  Humility is not native to us.  We came into this world as sin rebels touting our own independence and grasping for self-generated proofs as to our own importance.  It was only when the Spirit worked to convict us of our sins and open our blinded eyes to the glory of Jesus that we came to our senses.  But the Spirit’s work in our hearts was just beginning.  He alone is able to cause us to rightly esteem ourselves before God and others according to the measure of God’s holiness and our own sinfulness.  To the extent that we are looking to Jesus and walking with Him, we will walk in humility.  It is as John Stott has said, “Every time we look at the cross Christ seems to be saying to us, ‘I am here because of you.  It is your sin I am bearing, your curse I am suffering, your debt I am paying, your death I am dying.’  Nothing in history or in the universe cuts us down to size like the cross.  All of us have inflated views of ourselves, especially in self-righteousness, until we have visited a place called Calvary.  It is there, at the foot of the cross, that we shrink to our true size.”

The call to have the “mind of Christ” is God’s call to us to walk in humility, according to the example of Jesus (Philippians 2:3-8).  It is as we “abandon selfish ambition and conceit” that we are able in “humility (to) count others as more significant than (ourselves)” (Philippians 2:3).  Having that attitude of mind, we can learn to love like Jesus!

In Pride we Love Self, but in Humility we Learn to Love Like Jesus

Heavenly Father.  You alone are deserving of all glory and honor for who You are and all You have done.  We’ve nothing to boast about, for all that we are and ever hope to be is all because of Your gracious work in our lives.  We came to You as lost sinners, by Your intervention You saved us and have worked to bless our lives in countless ways.  Forgive us for our prideful and boastful ways!  Thank you for the day when You opened our eyes to the truth, so that we might rightly esteem ourselves before You and others.  May the Spirit work mightily within us, renewing our minds through Your Word, that we might more fully adopt the mind of Christ.  That we might view others as more significant than ourselves and love them like Jesus.  Amen.

Love is not Jealous

Bible Reading: 1 Corinthians 3:1-3, 13:4-8a; James 4:1-12; 1 John 3:11-15

Jealousy is the “green eyed monster” that lurks in the hearts of men.  That’s the expression coined by Shakespeare in Othello (3:3), where Iago says: “O! beware, my lord, of jealousy; it is the green-eyed monster which doth mock the meat it feeds on.”  The idiom, in which we speak of someone “being green with envy,” has been part of our vernacular ever since.

In a fit of jealous rage Cain murdered his own brother (1 John 3:11-15).  The green-eyed monster that lies within the hearts of men has been at work ever since, causing much mayhem and leaving in his wake an overflowing graveyard of ruined relationships.  Jealousy is a universal malady and has the power to cause even the nicest people to behave in incredibly loathsome ways.

What is jealousy? Jealousy is a strong emotion!  The Greek term applies the notion of burning or boiling metaphorically to the desire to have that which belongs to another.  A related term speaks of the desire to deprive another of what he has.  The green-eyed monster of jealousy longs for both.  And will sometimes go to great and unimaginable lengths to obtain what he wants.

William Barclay phrases it this way, writing that “There are two kinds of envy. The one covets the possessions of other people; and such envy is very difficult to avoid because it is a very human thing. The other is worse—it grudges the very fact that others should have what it has not; it does not so much want things for itself as wish that others had not got them. Meanness of soul can sink no further than that.”

As I mentioned, jealousy is a universal malady.  James addressed this issue and spoke to its destructive influence: “What causes quarrels and what causes fights among you? Is it not this, that your passions are at war within you? You desire and do not have, so you murder. You covet and cannot obtain, so you fight and quarrel” (James 4:1-2).  Paul similarly chided the church in Corinth–reminding us that we Christians are not immune–saying, “For while there is jealousy and strife among you, are you not of the flesh and behaving only in a human way” (1 Corinthians 3:3)?

But there is a “more excellent way” (1 Corinthians 12:31)!  Jesus was never jealous!  He did not long to have that which was possessed by others, nor was he ever sad that others possessed what He did not have.  The One who was rich, but became poor, lived His life according to a radically different dynamic (2 Corinthians 8:9).  The desires for fortune, fame, and fun held no bearing over him, and He was thereby immune to that common human trait of seeking to gain at the expense of others (1 John 2:16).  According to His selfless manner, He was always giving and never taking, and once said, “It is more blessed to give than to receive” (Acts 20:35)!   The Apostle Paul adopted that same radical way of thinking and living (Acts 20:33-35).  And we have been called to the same (Philippians 2:3-8).

So, what are we to do about the green-eyed monster who would work to wreak havoc in our hearts and in our relationships? To the weapons we possess in our human arsenal he is as a huge unassailable dragon. If he is to be rendered powerless it will be by the Spirit and through the Word (1 John 2:14b). And it will be as we are Spirit-led empowered to walk in love, just like Jesus. Who lived His life not to get, but to give!

“It is More Blessed to Give than to Receive”

Heavenly Father.  Praise You for Your giving ways.  In spite of humankind’s rebellion, You’ve given us all life and provided for our needs.  Forgive us that we tend to take such things for granted, and even sometimes grumble in discontentment over that which we do not have.  As your children we have been blessed beyond measure in the riches of Your grace and mercy!  Forgive us too for envying others for what they possess.  Or, even being sad for their blessings!  May our hearts cling to You and Your truth that we might be delivered from such evil inclinations.  We marvel at the example of Jesus, who was never jealous, but only gave and gave until He gave His very life.  Holy Spirit, open the eyes of our hearts to see that true blessing is found not in getting, but in giving.  And lead us in that way that we might learn to love like Jesus.  Amen!

Love is Kind

Bible Reading: 1 Corinthians 13:4-8a; Luke 10:25-37

I could not help but notice how my uncle Bob was walking so gingerly along the pathway in front of me.  We were in Uganda; we had just finished a session in the Pastor’s Conference at the school and were on our way back to the guest house.  I looked at Bob’s feet and instantly diagnosed the problem–he was wearing some old worn-out sandals instead of the shoes he had left with that morning.  It turned out that one of the Ugandan pastors had told Bob that his sandals made his feet hurt.  So Bob kindly traded his shoes to the fellow in exchange for those sandals.  It was when we got back to the guesthouse that we found out why the sandals hurt his feet.  The soles had been reattached with nails the heads of which were protruding through the insoles.  Owie!  It was an act of kindness for sure!

We are kind when we are “disposed to be helpful.”  Kindness is a readiness to do good, relieve burdens, to be useful, to serve.  Someone has said that kindness is “love in work clothes.”  The story of the Good Samaritan is a splendid example of love expressed in showing kindness towards someone.  A poor fella was beaten and robbed.  The Good Samaritan showed compassion.  He bound up the man’s wounds, put him on his own animal, took him to the inn, and then cared for him. Then when he had to leave, he paid the innkeeper to take care of the man until he could return.  

The life of Jesus is full of examples of Him showing kindness to others.  As Acts 10:38 puts it, “He went about doing good,” as He healed the sick, fed the hungry, cleansed lepers, gave sight to the blind, etc.  “The kindness of God our Savior and His love for mankind appeared” when Jesus came to dwell among us (Titus 3:4).  It is at the cross where the full measure of His kindness was revealed!  And Jesus’ work on the cross instructs us “kind-ward” as Amy Carmichael once observed, “If I can write an unkind letter, speak an unkind word, think an unkind thought without grief and shame, then I know nothing of Calvary love.”

There are countless ways for us to show kindness towards others, just as we humans invariably find ourselves in needy situations.  In compassion we show concern by doing what we can to help.  A kind word to a discouraged friend can go a long way in lifting their spirits. Simple things, like buying someone’s coffee or lunch can make someone’s day.  It’s great to help a neighbor with a project at their house.  Or even just to be there with a caring presence for someone who is sick or bereaved will mean a lot.  The list goes on and on.  The greatest act of kindness of all is to share the gospel with someone, so that they might come to know Him who is always kind and is kind in the greatest measure.  And like the Good Samaritan, it is great to show kindness towards someone you don’t know.  Let that person behind you go first through the checkout line.  Donate helpful items to the Rescue Mission.  Or better yet, find a ministry like that in which you can help others in need.  Contribute to worthwhile causes that work to show kindness to folks all around the world. Even as many organizations are now raising funds to help those in Ukraine or those who have fled the country.   

With respect to showing kindness towards others, the American Quaker Missionary, Stephen Grellet, put it this way: “I shall pass through this world but once. Any good therefore that I can do or any kindness that I can show to any human being, let me do it now. Let me not defer or neglect it, for I shall not pass this way again.”

In Loving Like Jesus, We Will Find Countless Opportunities to Show Kindness

Heaven Father.  We praise and thank You that there was a day in which Your kindness appeared in the incarnation of Your Son.  And how incredibly blessed we are in Your kindness, that has worked to meet our greatest need.  We know that as Your children, You’ve called us to be imitators of You.  We are humbled by the reality of such a high calling.  May we walk accordingly.  All around us we see people with needs–great and small!  How privileged we are to have the opportunity to serve You by serving others.  Grant us the eyes to see and hearts to care in working to meet their needs, according to Your plan and leading.  And we will be careful to praise You in all, knowing that any good deeds we do have been prepared ahead of time by You!  Amen!

Love is Patient

Bible Reading: 1 Corinthians 6:1-8, 13:4-8a; Colossians 3:12-17

I was driving on the freeway when I noticed in my mirror that the car in the adjacent lane was being followed too closely by a truck. As the car passed me on the left it began slowing down until it eventually came to a complete stop (on the freeway!). I could see in my mirror that the driver had gotten out of his car and was waving his hands back and forth in displeasure at the driver who had been tail-gating him! I don’t know what happened after that, but I’m pretty sure it didn’t involve patience.

According to Vine’s Expository Dictionary, “patience is that quality of self-restraint in the face of provocation which does not hastily retaliate nor promptly punish; it is the opposite of anger and is associated with mercy and is used of God.” The patience spoken of here is a “patience with people,” the ability to put up with the frustrations associated with relating to people who are just as flawed as we are.

We are prone to impatience. Children are impatient with their parents, “When are we going to get there!” Parents with their children, “When will you ever learn to stop doing that?” Students with their teachers, “This is the most boring class ever!” Employees with their co-workers, “I don’t know why she never answers the phone?” Church members with their pastor, “When is he going to get done with this sermon?” All of us at the checkout line, “Why is this taking so long?” When others fail to adhere to our agenda or keep up with our schedule, we tend to get irritated.

The patience of Jesus was especially evident in the manner in which He related to the disciples. They were like us, far from perfect. Peter was especially prone to saying and doing stupid things. He once was so foolhardy to argue with Jesus, after Jesus had warned of His pending sufferings. Peter and his fellow disciples repeatedly revealed themselves to be slow learners and slow to believe. They even argued amongst themselves as to who was the greatest after Jesus had just washed their feet! Especially troubling was Peter’s threefold denial of Jesus, after he had vehemently affirmed his readiness even to die with Jesus! When Jesus was arrested, they all abandoned Him. Despite all their imperfections, Jesus was patient with them and never gave up on them. The extent of His love was made most evident on the cross, where He willingly and patiently subjected Himself to incredible abuse and scorn, exercising amazing self-restraint in the face of provocation!

How are we to account for the patience of Jesus? Jesus served no smartphone or calendar app. He lovingly served the Father and was always in perfect sync with the Father’s will. In love for others, He was always preferring their needs to His own. It was His selfless approach to life that made the difference. He had come to serve, not to be served, and it showed in how He patiently related to others.

It will help us to show patience if we keep in mind that God is in control of the affairs of our lives. It’s typically when we leave God out of our thinking that we tend to exhibit impatience with others. Our God, who is good and does good (Psalm 119:68), is not distant or removed from us and our happenings. He is “intimately acquainted with all (your) ways” (Psalm 139:3-4). Viewing your circumstances through this lense will make a difference in how you respond to life’s upsets. No matter what comes our way, God is able to cause all things to work together for good (Romans 8:28). In everything He is incredibly patient towards you, and He calls you to relate to others in kind.

Be Patient With Others for He is Patient With You

Lord Jesus.  Praise You for Your incredible patience with us!  Countless times we have failed You, but You never fail us.  Thank you for Your mercy and forbearance.  We are sometimes so easily irritated, even over silly things.  We are prone to a selfish way of thinking and living that is so contrary to Your example.  Forgive us.  May the Spirit work to open the eyes of our hearts to the beauty of Your Person and Your example.  Self is always vying for the throne in our hearts, grant us the wisdom and strength to keep You there always.  As we fix our eyes on You, may we be drawn to that radical way of thinking and living that puts the needs of others first.  And in that manner may we be patient with others, even as You are so incredibly patient with us!  Amen.